[ memory is a curious thing for someone like raphael. in truth, his immortality has only really begun. there are humans as old as and older than him, many with more worldly experience under their belts. and yet, he already feels a certain urgency to make sure some moments will last long after they're over, years or decades or centuries in the future. he doesn't know just how long a life he'll lead, but already, so many things have faded, shriveling into mere wisps of taste, touch, sound. others remain, almost as clear as the day he'd experienced them.
the moment he'd stared into a pool of sunlight and decided it was the best and only solution to what stretched out in front of him is a memory he wishes he could filter out, but other, better images remain too. a birthday party in the kitchen of his oldest home. the soft heartbreak of a reunion held on a certain doorstep. the look of private respect magnus bane had offered him across the foyer of the hotel.
raphael can't know for sure in the moment, when so much of his focus is pinned under justin's lips and hands and the reality of this, but he thinks that this will be another memory that time won't be able to touch.
the heat of justin is almost startling, and a voice in raphael's mind wants to focus on how different they are, how strange this marrying of alive and not so alive could be. another voice, the one he allows to grow louder, tells him this warmth is here because justin is offering it and offering it gladly. all in all, physical touch is not something he craves often, but there is nothing wrong with it now, now that justin has become an indisputable part of raphael's life, unexpected as it was. it feels safe in a way that is wholly unfamiliar, too much and yet just enough at once.
the drag of justin's teeth over his lip is a distinct indication that he knows, more than raphael, what he's doing, and so raphael allows himself to be lead, pressing into the fluid shifts between kissing and being kissed. he nearly shivers when the hand appears at his neck, the skin sensitive, untouched for so long. if anything, it's accustomed to teeth more than fingertips. his own hand catches at justin's wrist, not to pull it away, but to feel it there. justin's heartbeat pounds loud enough that it seems to reverberate in raphael's chest.
he breathes in, draws back a fraction. ]
Justin.
[ his voice is a whisper but it doesn't waver. he's seeking reassurance, confidence from justin that he hasn't made a mistake. ]
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the moment he'd stared into a pool of sunlight and decided it was the best and only solution to what stretched out in front of him is a memory he wishes he could filter out, but other, better images remain too. a birthday party in the kitchen of his oldest home. the soft heartbreak of a reunion held on a certain doorstep. the look of private respect magnus bane had offered him across the foyer of the hotel.
raphael can't know for sure in the moment, when so much of his focus is pinned under justin's lips and hands and the reality of this, but he thinks that this will be another memory that time won't be able to touch.
the heat of justin is almost startling, and a voice in raphael's mind wants to focus on how different they are, how strange this marrying of alive and not so alive could be. another voice, the one he allows to grow louder, tells him this warmth is here because justin is offering it and offering it gladly. all in all, physical touch is not something he craves often, but there is nothing wrong with it now, now that justin has become an indisputable part of raphael's life, unexpected as it was. it feels safe in a way that is wholly unfamiliar, too much and yet just enough at once.
the drag of justin's teeth over his lip is a distinct indication that he knows, more than raphael, what he's doing, and so raphael allows himself to be lead, pressing into the fluid shifts between kissing and being kissed. he nearly shivers when the hand appears at his neck, the skin sensitive, untouched for so long. if anything, it's accustomed to teeth more than fingertips. his own hand catches at justin's wrist, not to pull it away, but to feel it there. justin's heartbeat pounds loud enough that it seems to reverberate in raphael's chest.
he breathes in, draws back a fraction. ]
Justin.
[ his voice is a whisper but it doesn't waver. he's seeking reassurance, confidence from justin that he hasn't made a mistake. ]